Love after adoption?

Oh baby. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard this question. If I’m being honest, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked myself this question. As a single 30-something year old, it’s been hard enough to date. I’ve chosen to start my family as a single mother and often times wonder if I’ll ever find someone who supports the path I’ve chosen. Will they be able to handle some of the challenges that come along with being the parent of a special needs child?

I recently spoke to a good friend of mine about my dating after adoption fears. She chuckled a little when I spoke of my concerns and pretty much told me to tell my brain to shut up! “One of the things I love most about you is that you think things through and plan ahead. Unfortunately, that’s also one of the things that stands in your way!” Well, for heavens sake. If that wasn’t a light bulb moment for me… She’s right!

If I think about it, it could be easier to date as a single parent. First of all, when you have children, your network becomes much larger. From school activities to extracurricular hobbies, you’re bound to meet new people all the time. The likelihood of running into other single parents is fairly high. For me and other single moms I know, when we set our minds on something, there’s not much that can stand in our way. That’s probably exactly the attitude we need to have in this case. Put your attention on your children and don’t worry about dating. It’ll come when you stop trying to focus (*cough* control) it. Step out of your own way.

Author – Simone Jennings (@simonejennings)

Published in Adoption, Lifestyle, Relationships